If your criticism and accusation are always out of place, and your
partner always feel like he has to explain his action all the time, but you keep
doing it, that means you're controlling. If your partner feels like you
are always reading him wrong which is causing you to criticize and
accuse him, then he thinks you are wired to read your partner
wrong, you're not malleable, you are just that way . He is going to emotionally tune you out,
and alienate himself from you. Signs of this are: wanting to live in a
separate room, doing stuff by himself, not attending at family
gatherings, not going to out to do something fun with you, always
spending time in solitude because spending time with you would drain his
mental energy, etc.
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